forced and given a chance.
Therefore, never tell and force your children to say or speak out on anything.
It was bed time and a smart little boy of 9 was forced to say his bedtime
prayer by his father.
Little Boy: But I don't know how to pray..
Dad in a stern voice: Just pray for your family members, friends and
neighbours, the poor, and others you could think of.
Little Boy: "Dear Lord, thank you for our visitors and their
children, who finished all my cookies and ice cream.
Bless them so they wont come again.
Forgive our neighbor's son, who removed my sister's clothes and
wrestled with her on her bed.
This coming Christmas, please send clothes to all those poor naked
ladies on my Daddy's blackberry, and provide shelter for the homeless
men who use mom's room when daddy is at work.
AMEN ".
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Two friends meet after many years ...
They talk about their past life ...
One asks the other:
- And how's your sex life?? ....
- Same As Coca-Cola .......
- Oh great! .... Full of bubbles, eh?! ....
Nothing like that! ...
Before it was 'NORMAL',
then it became 'LIGHT',
and now it is 'ZERO' !
then it became 'LIGHT',
and now it is 'ZERO' !
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Adult Scrabble...
Rearrange the letters to spell out an important part of the human body which is even more useful when erect.
P N E S I
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People who wrote SPINE became doctors... PEOPLE WHO WROTE WHAT I THINK THEY WROTE, IT'S TIME THEY STOP WATCHING PORN.
Rearrange the letters to spell out an important part of the human body which is even more useful when erect.
P N E S I
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People who wrote SPINE became doctors... PEOPLE WHO WROTE WHAT I THINK THEY WROTE, IT'S TIME THEY STOP WATCHING PORN.
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A SMART WOMAN SAYS .....
1
He said to me . ... . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got
nothing to put in it
I said to him .... . . You wear pants don't you?
2
He said to me ............. Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said to him ............... That's a good idea - you stand by the
stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing
3
He said to me ..... What have you been doing with all the grocery
money I gave you?
I said to him ........ Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
4
He said to me. ..... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him ........ They don't have time.
5
He said to me..... How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him ...... I don't know; it has never happened.
6
He said to me..... Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive,
caring and good-looking?
I said to him .......They already have boyfriends.
7
He said to me....What do you call a woman who knows where her husband
is every night?
I said to him..... A widow.
8
He said to me.... Why are married women heavier than singlewomen?
I said to him ..... Single women come home, see what's in the fridge
and go to bed..Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to
the fridge.
He said to me . ... . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got
nothing to put in it
I said to him .... . . You wear pants don't you?
2
He said to me ............. Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said to him ............... That's a good idea - you stand by the
stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing
3
He said to me ..... What have you been doing with all the grocery
money I gave you?
I said to him ........ Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
4
He said to me. ..... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him ........ They don't have time.
5
He said to me..... How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him ...... I don't know; it has never happened.
6
He said to me..... Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive,
caring and good-looking?
I said to him .......They already have boyfriends.
7
He said to me....What do you call a woman who knows where her husband
is every night?
I said to him..... A widow.
8
He said to me.... Why are married women heavier than singlewomen?
I said to him ..... Single women come home, see what's in the fridge
and go to bed..Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to
the fridge.
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WOMEN WHO KNOW THEIR PLACE
Barbara Walters, of 20/20, did a story on gender roles in Kabul,
Afghanistan, several years before the Afghan conflict.
She noted that women customarily walked five paces behind their husbands.
She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind
their husbands. Despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem happy to maintain the old custom.
Ms Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, 'Why do you now
seem happy with an old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?'
The woman looked Ms Walters straight in the eyes, and without hesitation said,
"Land mines.”
Moral of the story is (no matter what language you speak or where you go): BEHIND EVERY MAN, THERE'S A SMART WOMAN (OR MAYBE THREE).
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