Monday Humour - Aahh ... It's the husband vs wife jokes again

This is the best and most civil way to have a fight between husband and wife instead of resorting to physical force ...

Poems written by WIFE and HUSBAND.

WIFE:

I wrote your name on sand, it got washed

I wrote your name in air, it was blown away

Then I wrote you name on my heart, I got a Heart Attack.

HUSBAND:

God saw me hungry, he created pizza

He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi

He saw me in the dark, he created light

He saw me without problems, he created YOU

WIFE:

Twinkle, twinkle, little star

You should know what you are

And once you know what you are

Mental hospital is not so far

HUSBAND:

The rain makes all things beautiful

The grass and flowers too

If rain makes all things beautiful

Why doesn't it rain on you?

WIFE:

Roses are red, violets are blue

Monkeys like you, should be kept in a zoo

Don't feel angry, you will find me there too

Not in a cage but outside, laughing at you

AND THE SAGA CONTINUES ......

Position of a Husband is just like a split AC

No matter however loud he is in the outdoor

He is designed to remain silent, indoor.

"Husband is one who is the head of the family

But his wife is the neck

And whichever way she turns, he goes."

A man in Hell asked the Devil,

"Can I make a call to my wife?"

After making the call, he asked how much to pay.

The Devil said, "Nothing. Hell to hell is free."

Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE?

It means, "Without Information, Fighting Every time!"

Wife: No, darling. It means "With Idiot For Ever."

Wife: I wish I was a newspaper so I'd be in your hands all day.

Husband : I too wish you were a newspaper. So I could have a new one every day.

Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping pills.

Wife : When must I give them to him?

Doctor : They are for you.

Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are.

Husband : You should have known it the minute I asked you to marry me.

Wife : What will you give me if I clime the great Mount Everest?

Husband : A lovely Push ....!

And so, life goes on .......