Monday, July 18, 2011

Monday Humour

SARDARJI, OH SARDARJI


Sardar to his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining.
Sardar: So what
….. take an umbrella and go.


Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever -
What will come first, chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever you order first, will come first.


A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match.

All were busy writing except one, Sardarji.
He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"


Postman: I have to come 5 Miles to deliver you this packet
Sardar: Why did you come so far. Instead you could have posted it.


A Sardar & his wife filed an application for divorce.
Judge asked: How'll you divide your kids, you have 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! we'll apply NEXT YEAR

Sardar's wish: when I die, I wana die like my Grandpa who died peacefully

in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the car he was driving.


A teacher lecturing on population:

"In India, after every 10 secs a woman gives birth to a kid. "
A Sardar stands up "We must find & stop her!. "


A man: "Sardarji, tell me, why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in the evening not in the morning?"

Sardarji: ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.

Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
The Chinese friend just says "CHIN YU YAN" and dies.
Sardarji goes to China to find the meaning of his friend's last words.
And finds It means "YOU ARE STANDNG ON THE OXYGEN TUBE!"

Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing.
He said, "I am seeing how I look while sleeping."


Why did Sardar cut the sides of the capsule before taking it?

Guess what...
To avoid side effects!!!

Man: Sardarji where were you born?
Sardarji: Punjab .
Man: Which part?
Sardar: Oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body is born in Punjab yaar".


Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing me.

I don't know how she got my number, she interrupts whenever I call someone and says "please recharge your card"


A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls.

She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange,

he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.
She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For best results put on two coats".


A Sardar was drawing money from ATM.

A guy behind him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen your password.

Its 4 asterisks (****). "
And Sardar replied, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! You are wrong, Its 1258"


Q: How do you recognize a sardar in school or College???
A: They are the ones who erase their notebooks when the teacher erases the blackboard...

BOLO tarara!!


Q: Why did the sardar sleep with a scale?
A: Because he wanted to measure how long he has slept.


Sardarji Singh MBBS.
After finishing his MBBS, Dr Sardarji Singh starts his own practice.
He checked his first patient's eyes, then the tongue, and finally the ears using a torch.
Finally he said, "Battery is Ok !!!"

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The Arabs aren't happy!

They're not happy in Gaza.
They're not happy in Egypt.
They're not happy in Libya.
They're not happy in Morocco.
They're not happy in Iran.
They're not happy in Iraq.
They're not happy in Yemen.
They're not happy in Afghanistan.
They're not happy in Pakistan.
They're not happy in Syria.
They're not happy in Lebanon.

So where are they happy?

They're happy in England.
They're happy in France.
They're happy in Italy.
They're happy in Germany .
They're happy in Canada .
They're happy in Denmark .
They're happy in Sweden .
They're happy in the USA.
They're happy in Norway.
They're happy in every country that is not infected with Islam.

And who do they blame?

Not Islam.
Not their leadership.
Not themselves.

THEY BLAME THE COUNTRIES THEY ARE HAPPY IN.

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All food come from India

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